Home Forums Announcements Unacceptable behaviour on this forum

This topic contains 69 replies, has 28 voices, and was last updated by  Futureman 1 week, 2 days ago.

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  • #485452

    Admin Paul
    Keymaster
    • Topics: 5
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    • Explorer

    Member since
    23rd June 2019

    The following post is in response to the unbelievable and unacceptable forum postings I have witnessed in the last few days. Specifically, the “Boris Johnson” thread.

    The fact that I am having to waste my time writing this kind of message annoys me even more. So, for the sake of clarity, let me just remind everybody that the point of our site, and forum, is to nurture a community spirit, where decent people can express opinions and feelings without fear of ridicule or abuse. And yes, there is a fine line between expressing your opinion and feelings, and being rude and aggressive. In my naivety I presumed that mature and educated people would grasp what we are trying to achieve, and that we would not need to be prescriptive in laying down what is acceptable, and what is not. On the basis that a small minority find it hard to grasp this fact, here is a summary as to what we, and the majority of our members expect-

    -a space to air views and opinions that do not cause offence to other members, or people as a whole. Common sense should tell you what could be construed as “offensive”

    -if people have a personal issue with another member, the forum IS NOT the place to air those arguments.

    -we want to encourage an ethos of positivity, help, and support, and NOT destructive negativity.

    -we as “moderators” would rather be not moderating. The forum should be, and will be, self policing, based on mutual self respect.

    In terms of the way forward, nobody is to be removed by us at this point. Instead, for those people who cannot, or will not, abide by our principles, I would ask them to leave voluntarily, as there will be zero tolerance going forward.

    So, I would ask you all please to put past grievances behind you. Life is far too short to waste on this kind of situation. Please, let’s all move on.

    3+
    #485461

    Anonymous
    • Topics: 1
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    • Guardian
    • ★★★★★

    Member since
    1st January 1970

    But this is 2019, everyone is entitled to have their own opinion. If someone ridicules you, then you should be able to ridicule back. Take a look at all the shite that’s going on in the world! A bit of banter and arguments is nothing! Seriously, you are taking this all too seriously :yes: :yes:

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    #485464

    Pete James
    Participant
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    • Mega Star
    • ★★★★★★★★

    Member since
    22nd July 2016

    Was the member made ‘anonymous’ for that comment Paul ?

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    #485468

    admin Wizard
    Keymaster
    • Topics: 98
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    • Guardian
    • ★★★★★

    Member since
    16th March 2016

    I banned cupcake as she’s had countless opportunities under multiple aliases and continuously breaks the forum rules. As you know I hate having to do this but I simply can’t allow the few destroy things for the many.

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    #485474

    Cheekiweeki
    Participant
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    • Guardian
    • ★★★★★

    Member since
    8th April 2016

    Well said Paul, setting out a good positive point of direction for people to follow.

    Life has changed so much and I blame social media because it allows people the anonymity to be nasty and bully people who don’t share the same opinion. I am wondering now, if when someone reads an opinion that differs from theirs, do they really feel that they are being personally ‘ridiculed’ and don’t understand that it is only someone else expressing their own opinion?

    Is there really a member called “anonymous”  Wizard, Paul and PJ are you kidding about – I see ‘Anonymous’ has been a member since 1970  LOL –  a member of what?

     

    3+
    #485477

    Steve
    Participant
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    • Adventurer
    • ★★

    Member since
    10th April 2018

    I was not aware cupcake has been a multiple member on here, however in my view what she said on the Boris thread did not amount to a capital offence.  Yes she was critical and like a few others, myself included, highlighted the short comings of a moderator.  Given what that moderator posted admitting his short comings, I for one think the expulsion of Cupcake is overly harsh.

    1+
    #485480

    Radon
    Participant
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    • Scout
    • ★★★

    Member since
    19th April 2019

    Yes there are some bullies on this site that make the forum lives of others difficult to say the least. Perhaps they will temper their approach now?

    1+
    #485483

    admin Wizard
    Keymaster
    • Topics: 98
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    • Guardian
    • ★★★★★

    Member since
    16th March 2016

    Hi Steve I can understand why you might think this but I’ve been the one whose had to deal with her over multiple alias and threads (not including Boris). Many times I’ve tried to reach out to her and explain what we’re trying to achieve and every time it’s fallen on deaf ears. I don’t remove members lightly but she’s had more chances than most and I have to draw a line.

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    #485492

    Steve
    Participant
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    • Adventurer
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    Member since
    10th April 2018

    Understood.

    I knew Boris was a bad idea!

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    #485508

    Cheekiweeki
    Participant
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    Member since
    8th April 2016

    Night all

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    #485521

    Blue velvet
    Participant
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    • Mega Star
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    Member since
    19th March 2016

    I’m away for five minutes and all 🤬🤬🤬🤬 breaks out ! I’ve had no broadband, tv or telephone since last Thursday 27 . So have missed all the antics of ‘Boris’ and the start of the tennis ! 🎾🎾 :rose:

    2+
    #485528

    Cheekiweeki
    Participant
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    • Guardian
    • ★★★★★

    Member since
    8th April 2016

    You can always catch up, Blue Velvet. Have you got iPlayer for BBC?  If so you can watch all that you missed, especially Wimbledon, you can watch all the matches in sequence if you want. We didn’t get a chance to sit and watch Venus and the new 15-year-old ‘kid’ on the block play on Monday, so we watched it yesterday.  Probably on YouTube anyway.

    Hopefully, all will be nice and calm and polite around here from now on.

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    #485537

    officer crabtree
    Participant
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    • Chief
    • ★★★★

    Member since
    23rd March 2016

    Unfortunately the number of mature and educated people are diminishing every day

    The chidish antics of politicians turning their back in the EU parliament the childish slogan of the Lib Dems (Bollocks to Brexit) the suggestion by a so called comedian that people should throw battery acid at politicians they do not like  I could go on the list grows daily   only now contribute if I can help with a specific query

    6+
    #485540

    frenchdogs62
    Participant
    • Topics: 1
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    • Adventurer
    • ★★

    Member since
    19th March 2016

    Hi I have to say some of the comments on here at times do seem a bit sharp and directed at each other it is sad people need to feel the need to change identity to post a point of view sometimes when I see a post and disagree decide to leave it.
    We can not always agree but find it very wearing to read the fores and against which run into pages and never resolve to accept a difference but becomes hostile! I am aware a lot of you know each other over a long period of time but to newer people some of the assumptions are it is run by a select few and some I know no longer feel like putting there heads above the parapet to be shouted down.

    5+
    #485546

    Cheekiweeki
    Participant
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    • Guardian
    • ★★★★★

    Member since
    8th April 2016

    Hi I have to say some of the comments on here at times do seem a bit sharp and directed at each other it is sad people need to feel the need to change identity to post a point of view sometimes when I see a post and disagree decide to leave it. We can not always agree but find it very wearing to read the fores and against which run into pages and never resolve to accept a difference but becomes hostile! I am aware a lot of you know each other over a long period of time but to newer people some of the assumptions are it is run by a select few and some I know no longer feel like putting there heads above the parapet to be shouted down.

     

    “HERE HERE!”  FD62  My feelings exactly :rose:

    1+
    #485550

    Admin Paul
    Keymaster
    • Topics: 5
    • Replies: 31
    • Contributions: 36
    • Explorer

    Member since
    23rd June 2019

    Thank you for your positivity, it is appreciated!

    0
    #485555

    John James
    Participant
    • Topics: 4
    • Replies: 104
    • Contributions: 108
    • Scout
    • ★★★

    Member since
    5th September 2018

    There has to be a huge void in your life if you need to find dissent with all and sundry – I suppose it’s a sign of the times – we live in a dissatisfied world where a great deal of people feel the need to lay their failings on others’ shoulders.

    Despite what’s going on here, there is considerable positivity on this site – a good example is the discussion on improving individual attitudes to conservation and waste – it ran for ages and a lot of good ideas came out of it.

    Sadly, the phrase “Live and let live” has long flown out of the window. With all the great and the good throwing brickbats at each other all day long aided and abetted by a large portion of the media, it’s little wonder that those with a minimal sense of reason are going to be whipped up into a storm.

    1+
    #485594

    koat
    Participant
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    • Mega Star
    • ★★★★★★★★

    Member since
    17th March 2016

    it’s a pity that the moderator is routinely attacked for being a human being rather than an algorithm

    3+
    #485597

    Pete James
    Participant
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    • Mega Star
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    Member since
    22nd July 2016

    I can’t actually see why VK was attacked so vehemently. What heinous crime did he committ ?
    Moderating is a thankless job, I certainly wouldn’t want the job.

    3+
    #485600

    Vegemite Kid
    Moderator
    • Topics: 321
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    • Mega Star
    • ★★★★★★★★

    Member since
    18th March 2016

    Thank you for the post, Paul, put much more eloquently than I could have. Mind you, if I’d made such a post, following the closing of the BJ thread, I’m fairly sure certain members would have continued the haranguing on that new post.

    I’m totally in agreement with : “we as “moderators” would rather be not moderating. The forum should be, and will be, self policing, based on mutual self respect” – that was how I was trying to do it, but apparently it wasn’t working. Now that you’ve posted, as an unknown quantity for the moment, let’s hope things take an upward turn.

    2+
    #485610

    Admin Paul
    Keymaster
    • Topics: 5
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    • Explorer

    Member since
    23rd June 2019

    Thanks VK,

    Onwards and upwards!

    0
    #485621

    Jazzy
    Participant
    • Topics: 29
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    • Super Star
    • ★★★★★★★

    Member since
    1st December 2017

    I see I’m still a member on here despite being asked to be removed.

    I don’t appreciate being yellow-carded unfairly. I have my pride.

    All I did was point out how wrongly targeted some groups of society are as regards environmental concerns in response to a couple photos posted on here It wasn’t a nasty, personal attack in any way. I stand by what I posted. I have seen far worse on here but I guess Tom wasn’t looking in then. It’s a shame he doesn’t monitor things on a more regular basis and so be able to weigh things up better. I’ve been goaded and baited on here and have tried to deal with it in a mature way but everyone has their limits sometimes. I hope they’re satisfied.

    Just make it a red card and be done with it. I admire and greatly respect some on here, I thought perhaps I was providing some balance to some of the more extreme right wing views expressed on here but this is obviously not wanted.

    I’m not trying to say I’ve always been an angel and know that I can be sharp sometimes and if this has offended or put members off from posting then I’m very sorry.

    The words ‘life is too short’ keep being bandied around. Indeed it is to be bothering with a forum that treats me like this.

    Despite all this I  wish Tom and his new business partner Admin Paul, all the very best.

    This isnt a looking for pity or making myself the victim or begging not to leave post by the way. I know I can be arsey and sarcastic.  I’ve made my decision to go.

     

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    #485630

    Pete James
    Participant
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    • Mega Star
    • ★★★★★★★★

    Member since
    22nd July 2016

    Great post J.

    I’m neither right nor left, just a fence-sitter I suppose.

    Balanced discussion / argument is paramount on any forum providing it stays fairly respectful so that’s why you need to stick around to give your side of the debate.

    2+
    #485633

    koat
    Participant
    • Topics: 78
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    • Mega Star
    • ★★★★★★★★

    Member since
    17th March 2016

    not sure of the yellow card thing as just started playing walking (over 50) football a couple weeks ago (very good fun!) but hope you stay around Jazzy :rose:

    1+
    #485647

    Admin Paul
    Keymaster
    • Topics: 5
    • Replies: 31
    • Contributions: 36
    • Explorer

    Member since
    23rd June 2019

    Hey Jazzy,

    We have never communicated before, but I know Tom would like you to stay. I have always backed Tom’s judgement, so that’s good enough for me. So, can I ask you please to reconsider. All we want to see is everyone get on with each other, irrespective of different opinions and views. Let’s bin the card and get on with life.

    Meantime, have a good evening,

    Paul

     

    1+
    #485651

    Deboer
    Participant
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    • Guardian
    • ★★★★★

    Member since
    17th February 2019

    All I did was point out how wrongly targeted some groups of society are as regards environmental concerns in response to a couple photos posted on here It wasn’t a nasty, personal attack in any way. I stand by what I posted. I have seen far worse on here but I guess Tom wasn’t looking in then. It’s a shame he doesn’t monitor things on a more regular basis and so be able to weigh things up better. I’ve been goaded and baited on here and have tried to deal with it in a mature way but everyone has their limits sometimes. I hope they’re satisfied.

    I quite agree with you Jazzy .

    I couldn’t or can’t understand the logic of the ” yellow card ”

    You are one of the more logical and honest posters on this site and it would be a great miss if you were to leave

    Better to remove those that think they are more moderator than the moderator than someone that questions   some of the subtle nastiness ? :rose:

    2+
    #485655

    Fruitcake
    Participant
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    • Mega Star
    • ★★★★★★★★

    Member since
    13th July 2018

    I’m sad that all this has happened, I enjoy the debates and discussions and all the different takes on topics, I think the strong characters among us add to the interest, as long as personal attacks are avoided it makes for a healthy balance.

    1+
    #485678

    Cheekiweeki
    Participant
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    • Guardian
    • ★★★★★

    Member since
    8th April 2016

    I’m not trying to say I’ve always been an angel and know that I can be sharp sometimes and if this has offended or put members off from posting then I’m very sorry.

    Jazzy, you and I have had a few back and forths where I felt you were ‘getting at me’,  but I really felt that over several of our last posts we had come back to a more even keel. You ‘quietly’ explained where ‘you’ were coming from and I didn’t feel that you were ‘attacking’ me for what were my views. I appreciated and I was impressed that you had taken the time to back up your point of view with your research and you broadened my knowledge giving me another angle that I was not aware of.  I think you should reconsider and continue to contribute to UiB, it will be like lamb without mint sauce, tomatoes without basil or spaghetti bolognese without cheese if you leave now. :rose:   Please?

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    #485684

    Vegemite Kid
    Moderator
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    • Mega Star
    • ★★★★★★★★

    Member since
    18th March 2016

    A good reason for not deleting anyone, if it can be avoided, is the resulting ‘Anonymous’ in place of their name. It doesn’t do a forum any good to have lots of Anonymouses floating about.

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    #485690

    koat
    Participant
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    • Mega Star
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    Member since
    17th March 2016

    anonymouses floating about

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